At the beginning of a new year, memes about resolutions to eliminate negativity and “fake friends” are shared all over the internet. The urge to be better and do away with bad habits and bad friends is overpowering. This year 2022 is no exception.
For instance, this year, James Clear’s book, Atomic Habits, is gaining more attention and it is a delight to watch people make efforts to read and share their insights with others.
However, as lovely as resolutions look and sound, so also are they tempting to give up on easily. Especially the urge to keep being friends with those you’ve vowed to cut loose in the new year. In this article, we’d be looking at some must-have qualities for a person to be called a friend. If your current friends do not have these qualities, then perhaps you have to cut them loose.
Things to look out for in your friends.
A friend who cannot communicate their feelings, thoughts and misgivings about situations can be quite deadly. And this could transition or disintegrate into malice. This simply means, there are days when things could go wrong between you and your friend and they could be unhappy about the situation. However, instead of them communicating it to you to understand your perspective, they keep quiet about it until it breeds resentment.
For example, NaijaSingleGirl on Instagram, shared her experience about going out with a friend. The said friend refused to let her exchange numbers with a guy who seemed interested in her. Furious and a little regretful, she wrote in her instagram caption what happened. However, after reading comments from people who knew nothing about their friendship, she realized she had to communicate. Communicate her misgivings with her friend before it developed into resentment. Here’s the story she shared after confronting her friend.
A new business owner is often advised to start with family and friends. This is because no one understands you better than them. Good friends extend support without holding back. However, on days they cannot, it doesn’t translate to being a bad friend. It just means that they do not have the capacity to do that in a given moment or period. Support also isn’t limited to finance only. It extends to and beyond moral and physical assistance.
Can your friend(s) be there for you at your lowest?
Humans, by default, are selfish. We put ourselves first before others. But there are some people who are extreme with it. These people think about themselves only. They want to be cared for but not care for others. These kind of friends want to be listened to and not listen to others. They often say “you’re a good friend,” “you are always there for me” but they never reciprocate.
Friends like this drain you mentally, physically, financially and intellectually without remorse. A classic example is Peach in the movie series titled YOU. She was constantly in need. She drained Becca and kept sabotaging her everytime she (Becca) was supposed to make progress.
It’s important to note that, although no one is perfect, the barest minimum shouldn’t be accepted.
Article written by Sola Tales.