Vaginismus is a condition whereby the muscles in the vagina tighten and prevent any sort of penetration. Either from a tampon, a pelvic exam or a penis.

Unlike others, people with vaginismus find it difficult to have penetrative sex as it’s either painful or futile. And this can lead to worry and self-blame.

Some cases of Vaginismus are mild while others are severe. Some cases of vaginismus can be cured with therapy while others require much more than that.

This condition is a body’s way of defending itself against external ‘attacks’. Often, vaginismus is a psychological condition and for many, it can be traced back to their childhood, if the individual was exposed to rape, child abuse or sexual scenarios as kids. As a result, their minds believe every attempt at insertion could be a repeat of the past or an exposure to severe pain.


What then are the solutions to Vaginismus?

As mentioned earlier, Vaginismus could be mild or severe, depending on the individual in question. However, there is no one way to treat Vaginismus. What works for one may not for the other.

Here are some DIY treatments you can try.


Kegel exercise, also known as pelvic-floor exercise. It involves repeatedly contracting and relaxing the muscles that form part of the pelvic floor. For cases of vaginismus , kegels are done to relax the muscles for penetration to be made easy.

How to do kegel exercises

  • Tighten the muscles on your pelvic floor
  • Hold it in for about four seconds
  • Release it for another four seconds
  • Repeat for a few minutes.

For better understanding, watch this video for help.


Therapy is a form of treatment intended to relieve or heal a disorder, and there are different types of therapy. In this case, sex therapy is highly recommended.

If kegels do not work for you, you may want to see a sex therapist. It involves speaking to a sex therapist about how you feel whenever attempt at penetration is made and getting solutions.


Severe vaginismus could require surgery. The sufferer would be put under sedation during the procedure so as to not feel any pain. However, you would need to see a gynecologist first to know if surgery is recommended for you or not.

If you have vaginismus, the first thing to understand is that it’s not your fault. Also, take deep breaths as you walk your way through solutions. In the same vein, if you feel alone in your journey of mental and physical healing, read the experience of Tito the Writer on Instagram. 

Article written by Sola Tales

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